6 Times Netflix Was Better Than A Boyfriend.

“Oh my god, my boyfriend surprised me with flowers at work today.” “My boyfriend just took my mom out for lunch!” “Isn’t he just so cute?”
 
We all have that friend. That one person who never shuts up about his or her significant other. Ya, you’re in love, we get it. Yes, he is totally your soulmate. But, I ask, have you considered the shortcomings of a boyfriend in general? Did you even think to compare the benefits of a boyfriend to the benefits of Netflix? No, I didn’t think so.
 
After years of gruelling academic research, studies show, not surprisingly, some serious advantages to on-demand entertainment which most boyfriends lack. Please continue reading to see what scientists have discovered.
 
  1. It’s always available.

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If you need some one-on-one time, Netflix is ready and wiling. It doesn’t have a soccer game. It doesn’t have ‘work function’ or a stupid family dinner. It is there for you, whenever and wherever.

  1. It can accommodate your many moods.

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Did your best friend just get engaged and you need to watch Robert De Niro chase down a twelve year old kid with an axe? Perhaps you just failed your math midterm and need to cry it out. Yup, Netflix can cater to your every whim.

  1. It doesn’t care that you’re clingy.

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Need an hour of its time? Maybe two, or twenty? Netflix is unwaveringly there for you. It doesn’t care that you blow off your friends, procrastinate studying, or call in sick to work. You need a day in bed? That’s totally fine.

  1. It takes note of what you like.

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Netflix will notice if you’ve been really into cool hipster films. Netflix will recognize how intelligent you are from watching all those documentaries, and how you and Matt Damon definitely would have a connection if you met. It is so interested in you and your likes that it will even suggest titles you might enjoy! What a gem.

  1. It doesn’t judge you.

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Do you want to eat an entire bag of chips? That’s cool. Maybe even whip out a little Ben & Jerry’s after those chips? No problem. Netflix doesn’t judge, because Netflix understands. It even learns to love your junior high school tracksuit, in that ugly sort of way.

  1. It will stay up late with you.

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Feel like crying your eyes out? Needing to let out some deep seated emotions? Netflix is there for you. It won’t insist on following a curfew or bring up work the next morning. It will stay up with you until the wee hours of the night, soothing you with the sweet sounds of Chad Michael Murray.

But sure, stay with your boyfriend if he’s just that great. 

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5 comments

  1. Hi :) this made me laugh so much i relate so much ♡

    1. Hi youngprettymummy, thanks for your comment! I am so glad you enjoyed the post!

  2. Hahaha! This was too funny!

  3. Nice! I’ve been going steady with Netflix myself lately……

  4. Cristi tanase · · Reply

    Change the title with “netflix vs females” and read it in a mysoginistic tone….
    1. She is available… When you are in the mood not when she wants too..
    2. You can change the channel when she annoys you….
    3. You can MUTE HER whenever you feel like…
    4. ….

    I cannot write more….it is beneath me….but you get the point…i hope
    Sexist jokes are fine….? Really?…

    Wanna get hurt in the long term?…just teach people to gender profile and bash the other gender…because is so funny when you cannot relate to the other gender and just bash….

    Right ladies?….I mean how can a true feminist know how is it to be not understand and replaced with an object?….

    Now to light up….we males dan take a joke..and is a good one
    But you can have fun at a similar joke too…. About females?
    I really hope so…that will sure show some real non-bias thinking…

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